The Golden Girl's Cocktail Recipes: by Marissa DeAngelis

INTRO

The Dorothy or The Brooklyn Substitute Teacher

It's like a Manhattan (except for a kinky vermouth swap, but "who are you to judge"), with a more cynical attitude. She's all business, unless you take her to the Rusty Anchor or Beatlemania.

2 oz. rye whiskey

.75 oz dry vermouth (replace the sweet vermouth of a Manhattan, because she ain't sweet)

2 dashes of Angostura bitters (any bitters will do, it's Dorothy after all)

1 orange twist for garnish (she's in Florida, after all)

*May cause you to answer all the Jeopardy answers correctly, but still not get picked as a contestant.

The Blanche or The Southern Bellhop

For the restless bad girl and The Scarlett O'Hara-wannabes that want to drink and watch dirty movies on a rainy day, I combined the famous Scarlett O'Hara cocktail with an Alabama Slammer, and added even more sweetness, sourness, and spiciness. Because our Blanche is a complicated woman.

2 oz. Southern Comfort

1/2 oz. peach schnapps

2 ounces cranberry

1 jalapeno slice

Dash of agave or a splash of grenadine

Lime wedge for garnish

Shake drink before serving

*May cause you to French kiss the pillows and get arrested in Chattanooga.

The Rose or The Minnesota Mudslide

Every good girl has a dark side that wants to ride off on a motorcycle and drink something sweet, with marshmallows in front of a fireplace. If you're a real Golden Girls fan, you know that Rose has a twisted competitive side. But she has the biggest sweet tooth, so if you want to throw M&Ms or Skittles at the bottom of this drink, I assure you, it would be on-brand.

1 cup milk

1 cup ice cubes

1 oz. vodka

½ oz. coffee liquor

½ ounce Irish cream liquor

3 tablespoons coffee creamer (recommended flavors: French vanilla or hazelnut)

Chocolate syrup and toasted marshmallows, not for garnish, but to devour like a child.

*St. Olaf story not included.

Pour the vodka into the blender first. Then add the coffee liquor, Irish cream liquor, coffee creamer, and the milk. Lastly, pour the ice into the blender.

Put the lid on the blender and pulse to crush the ice or use the blender’s ice setting. Pour into your glass and add garnish. You can toast the marshmallows if you'd like.

The Sophia or The Godmother's Negroni

Marlon Brando was the Godfather, and his favorite drink was a Negroni. But on this show, Sophia's the Sicilian boss with all the answers. But don't get her angry—she's got a few curses up her sleeve, and no one would suspect her of a crime. I've combined three versions of the Negroni to fit her personality: the Classic Italian mixed with the Americano version, mixed of course with the Half-sized Negroni, because our Sophia, much like myself, is pint-sized fun.

½ oz. Campari

½ oz. vermouth

¾ oz. tequila or gin (whichever you prefer)

1 oz. soda water

A slice of lemon for garnish, and a smart answer for everything

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